Because Charlottesville happened...

08/16/2017

I generally like to stay away from controversial commentary when racial tension in the nation of the United States is once again fueled.

Why?
Because I do not want to be carted as a representation of a group of people.
I represent myself. Not my family, not my culture. So my views below are my own.

And as an individual I am reeling once again at the sting of racism.
Not racism  from over 400 years ago, or 100 years ago, or even of  just a little over 50 years ago. I am talking about the racism of today.

My mind goes numb at the stark reality that racism exists.
It exists intentionally and unintentionally.
It exists consciously and sub-consciously.
It exists inter-culturally and intra-culturally.

And because it is real and not a fragment of my imagination or a hyped-up false sense of victim mentality, my internal response to it is just as real:
Anger;
Frustration;
and to some degree - defeat.
As a holy Spirit-filled believer in the liberating power of Jesus' name I have experienced the gentility and the equality that the blood of Jesus creates among the body of believers.

I can honestly say  I have found I am not more comfortable around black people over whites. I am most comfortable around family. People that have the same blood and a like spirit- they are family to me. The family of God, from whatever nationality they originate, are with whom I feel the most at home.

Having said that, this experience does not render me unaffected by racism. I am affected and also empathetic to the way  unbelievers respond. My empathy does not mean I condone the means of response by way of violence, yet empathize I will.

Just being a child of God does not take away the reality for which I have to prepare my children. It does not erase the sting of comments about the darkness of their skin, or the purported hierarchy of those with lighter skinned school mates.
It does not erase my having to constantly remind my daughters that their hair is beautiful in its curly "unruliness", and that long straight hair is not the epitome of beauty- rather another dynamic of it.

I still get offended when the darkness of my skin is referenced in a comment encased in a joking manner, hesitating to say something that would render me too sensitive or taking things too personally.
Yet isn't it personal?

Will my Caucasian family and friends understand that I wrestle with filling out applications and answering the so-called equal opportunity questions?
Will they understand that sub-consciously I feel I have to make sure I carry myself a certain way so I can distinguish myself from the negative stereotypes  of the black-American culture?
Will they understand that I think that they think the way to equality is to view everyone as the same- that no one is uniquely this or that- and nothing is distinctively "black", " white", Hispanic, Asian, etc.?

And will thy understand that I am still trying to figure out how to navigate the current society as a young black female, caught in the middle of both sides of the spectrum.

I am privileged to work and worship in beautifully diverse environments. I don't even think twice about skin or color- I'm among family.
Then there are moments that differences are obvious- styles, tastes, expectations, and behaviors.
Its these differences however that we cannot ignore or allow to bring division.
We should acknowledge and embrace these differences among cultures.
God made them so that humanity as a whole could unite all their strengths, which in turn would overcome any weakness.

If one culture is great at hunting, one is great at cooking, one is great at building, one is great at planning, one is great at defending, another is great at adorning, and another is great at leading, and so on and so forth- the strengths would unite, rather than the weaknesses dividing.

This I believe was God's plan from the beginning. Yet Satan took the first step of separation when he planted a seed in Eve's mind for dominion over more than what God gave. She wanted to be like God. And that pursuit of divinity has cursed humanity from the beginning.

Until the earth is rid of this iniquity, there is a reality that can not be ignored.
Racism must be addressed painfully and  honestly. Dialogue must be uncomfortably engaged in, and these things goes not out but by fasting or prayer.